My back is better thanks to physiotherapy and a regimen of tiny exercises that are nevertheless astonishingly exhausting. (Did you know hips can become misaligned? So many things a body takes for granted!)
I got some very unexpected good news on the publishing front
I finished a review (of Darcie Little Badger’s Elatsoe, up on NPR this Sunday)
I dropped off some art to get framed (two Stephanie Pui-Mun Law prints)
Stu and I are moving house soon, which has been an enormous stressor, but has progressed to new milestones
That last one’s been so huge — I thought I’d ruined everything a few times, then found out I hadn’t — that I felt my body just slumping in relief several times a day. So many little things wrapped, and then at the end of it there was the beautiful take-out meal I’d scheduled back on Wednesday from our favourite restaurant, and when I went to pick it up the weather was cool enough that despite wearing a jacket I wanted a scarf.
So I want to ask — what do you associate with relief? How do you signal to yourself that you are done working for the day, that you deserve rest? How do you give yourself peace?
If you read that and felt despair — felt that you will never be done working, that there is no respite — let me ask you to show the kindness to yourself that you’ve so often shown to me, and let yourself have a moment’s rest. Let yourself imagine a hard line between the work and you, a space for you to exhale, to catch your breath, to unclench your muscles. Even if it’s 10 minutes. Ask nothing of yourself for those 10 minutes.
Here is a beautiful beverage made with roasted plum and cinnamon syrup and several other things to take you into the weekend.
Down time to me is a constant struggle to stop my brain going: what about the laundry, you still have to fix that chair leg, the plants should be watered, and and...
I try to remember that most of it isn’t urgent or pressing, but I still find myself charging from one chore to another rather than just laying on the couch reading. When there’s no real reason not to read and slow the hell down. So for now I’m eating breakfast and Then will reading on the deck with coffee.
What wonderful news about the house! I hope that the rest of the process runs smoothly, and look forward to hearing news of the new place.
Relief for me can feel like a physical thing. My whole body exhales and loosens. For me it feels different in quality from the sensation that I get when I sit and consciously relax, but that might just be because it's an involuntary process rather than being something I'm doing consciously.
Glad you're finding relief. I partially pre-empted this during COVID-19 by investing in a good work-from-home setup (mainly bought an Ergonomic chair and arranged/hacked the rest of my setup so that it's more ergnomic).
For me relief usually is when I can walk around or take a deep breath, which I do when I'm overwhelmed. I remember to do things one at a time (to "chunk" things), and that breaks can be inserted into those chunks.
In my previous job, I was the editorial assistant/managing editor so I'm usually tasked with arranging 50~70+ photo shoots in a year (with concepts... shooting in a studio is relatively simple but looking for a location and getting permits, props, etc. is the difficult part) so early in the year, you're thinking "it's already March and I've only done 4 photoshoots; how will I ever catch up?" and I told myself that we can only do it one step at a time.
Take care Amal and good luck with your relocation. Already mailed my postcard 2 weeks ago so hopefully it'll arrive there by the time you move to your new place.
It was nice to read this in front of my Shabbat candles, which are the best signifiers of peace I know. I'm glad there are some good things happening for you.
Each day when I am done with work I lay down on my couch with my cat. We usually stay there until it’s time to prepare dinner and it’s just a nice little moment with no pressures.
I signal relief to myself with either a gin and tonic or a whiskey drink. I usually pair said drink with a book or a video game of some sort - relief is often an escape as well. I read largely SF/F and play largely immersive RPGs so either way, I am trying to get out of my own head as much as possible.
Happy Friday, and congratulations!! So much good news :)
Relief for me is a palpable feeling of a weight lifted off my shoulders and off my chest.
This week has had many a rough moment, but right now I am resting. I finished a lit review that has been hounding me for weeks. I had only a couple of meetings today, and they went well. And for about 48 hours nothing is directly on fire around me -- that is the greatest relief of all. Oh, and I did some writing last night! It was late, right before sleep, but I felt so much better afterwards :)
May your weekend be nice and relaxing, and best of luck with the move!!
It is with unutterable relief that I read of your relief. Lying in bed first thing on a Saturday morning, reading of a friend’s (sometimes mysterious) good news.
Last night I binged the rest of Season 5 Lucifer, while Carlos was beside me watching a Twitch tournament. That was relaxing in a way we rarely get to be, which in its way was a relief.
“I feel thoroughly debauched,” I told him this morning.
Down time to me is a constant struggle to stop my brain going: what about the laundry, you still have to fix that chair leg, the plants should be watered, and and...
I try to remember that most of it isn’t urgent or pressing, but I still find myself charging from one chore to another rather than just laying on the couch reading. When there’s no real reason not to read and slow the hell down. So for now I’m eating breakfast and Then will reading on the deck with coffee.
Hi Amal!
What wonderful news about the house! I hope that the rest of the process runs smoothly, and look forward to hearing news of the new place.
Relief for me can feel like a physical thing. My whole body exhales and loosens. For me it feels different in quality from the sensation that I get when I sit and consciously relax, but that might just be because it's an involuntary process rather than being something I'm doing consciously.
Ahhh! Wonderful.
Hi Amal.
Glad you're finding relief. I partially pre-empted this during COVID-19 by investing in a good work-from-home setup (mainly bought an Ergonomic chair and arranged/hacked the rest of my setup so that it's more ergnomic).
For me relief usually is when I can walk around or take a deep breath, which I do when I'm overwhelmed. I remember to do things one at a time (to "chunk" things), and that breaks can be inserted into those chunks.
In my previous job, I was the editorial assistant/managing editor so I'm usually tasked with arranging 50~70+ photo shoots in a year (with concepts... shooting in a studio is relatively simple but looking for a location and getting permits, props, etc. is the difficult part) so early in the year, you're thinking "it's already March and I've only done 4 photoshoots; how will I ever catch up?" and I told myself that we can only do it one step at a time.
Take care Amal and good luck with your relocation. Already mailed my postcard 2 weeks ago so hopefully it'll arrive there by the time you move to your new place.
It was nice to read this in front of my Shabbat candles, which are the best signifiers of peace I know. I'm glad there are some good things happening for you.
Each day when I am done with work I lay down on my couch with my cat. We usually stay there until it’s time to prepare dinner and it’s just a nice little moment with no pressures.
Congratulations on the new house!
I signal relief to myself with either a gin and tonic or a whiskey drink. I usually pair said drink with a book or a video game of some sort - relief is often an escape as well. I read largely SF/F and play largely immersive RPGs so either way, I am trying to get out of my own head as much as possible.
Happy Friday, and congratulations!! So much good news :)
Relief for me is a palpable feeling of a weight lifted off my shoulders and off my chest.
This week has had many a rough moment, but right now I am resting. I finished a lit review that has been hounding me for weeks. I had only a couple of meetings today, and they went well. And for about 48 hours nothing is directly on fire around me -- that is the greatest relief of all. Oh, and I did some writing last night! It was late, right before sleep, but I felt so much better afterwards :)
May your weekend be nice and relaxing, and best of luck with the move!!
It is with unutterable relief that I read of your relief. Lying in bed first thing on a Saturday morning, reading of a friend’s (sometimes mysterious) good news.
Last night I binged the rest of Season 5 Lucifer, while Carlos was beside me watching a Twitch tournament. That was relaxing in a way we rarely get to be, which in its way was a relief.
“I feel thoroughly debauched,” I told him this morning.